Grief Is Unique
Posted by Literary Titan
Sixteen Days is an emotional memoir and enlightening handbook on grief. Why was this an important book for you to write?
It was important to write the book as so many people said to me, and to my family “I don’t know what to say” when my niece, Mary-Lou died. And I’d been in a similar position too, when attempting to support friends and colleagues who’d experienced bereavements. Whilst grief is unique, there are some things which, in my view, are probably helpful to many people. I wanted to share these to help other people feel more confident to know what to say, when someone dies.
What is one thing many people struggle with while grieving and what advice would you give them?
One thing is the weight of other people’s expectations. This is something I think many find hard. There can be expectations that the grieving person might behave in a certain way, and their journey of recovery, in the sense of feeling better, will be linear and will get better over time. I’d advise grieving people to be aware that despite what other people might think, say or do, it’s OK to feel the way you do. Go at your own pace, listen to yourself, work out what helps you to feel a bit better than you do right now – and do more of that.
What is one thing someone can do to support someone else that is grieving. And what is one thing they should not do?
If you’re trying to support grieving people, the best advice I can offer is to be there. You don’t have to fix the grieving person – despite how much you’d like to – be there to listen, to empathise, to agree that it’s utterly awful that their loved one has died and listen and watch for their cues on how you can help them. There’s no universal truth on the right or wrong things to do – but one I’d say is quite surely something to avoid is making assumptions about how the person is thinking or feeling. Whilst tempting, it’s thought to be unhelpful to suggest you “know how they feel” – even if you’ve experienced the same bereavement, all relationships are unique so the grief will be, too.
What do you hope is one thing readers take away from your book?
I hope readers take away some really practical things that anyone can do in the very early days following a death and, as such, they will feel more comfortable speaking to grievers. Many readers have said they’ll refer back to the book and that’s great to think I’ve created a resource that people might want to return to.
About Literary TitanThe Literary Titan is an organization of professional editors, writers, and professors that have a passion for the written word. We review fiction and non-fiction books in many different genres, as well as conduct author interviews, and recognize talented authors with our Literary Book Award. We are privileged to work with so many creative authors around the globe.
Posted on June 19, 2022, in Interviews and tagged author, author interview, book, book recommendations, book review, book reviews, book shelf, bookblogger, books, books to read, ebook, goodreads, grief, kindle, kobo, literature, nonfiction, nook, novel, read, reader, reading, self help, Sixteen Days, story, Victoria Wilson-Crane, writer, writing. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.
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