Mirror, Mirror on the Wall, Where Does My Self-Love Fall? you help readers probe their thoughts & emotions to uncover their self-concepts and provide tools to reshape them to live a fulfilling and happy life. Why was this an important book for you to write?
Wow, a great question! There were many reasons which compelled me to write this book. I’ll give you the twofold answer.
Briefly, I’ll speak on the ‘awakening (i.e, the beautiful awakening) moment’─ where I’d been and the new person I had become.
Revisiting my journey, I recalled all those broken pieces I’d lost along the way; while leaving that little girl inside me in pain. Abusing her so badly, a lot of my self-concepts were lost and scattered, e.g., self-worth; self-confidence; self-forgiveness; self-dignity; self-esteem; self-love; and other self-dimensions. I was like that Humpty Dumpty broken in pieces. I’d fallen down hard and needed help to get back up. I had to go back to pick up those broken pieces and start the work on “self.” Intitally, it was an extremely difficult challenge, but I never gave up. The struggle began having to rid self of those negative thoughts, figuring out all that was lost, and backtracking to pick up the pieces.
First and foremost, I had to forgive myself before I could move forward and begin the journey to “fixing self.” Once I put the energy and hard work into nurturing self, I saw a complete transformation. I’ve gained an appreciation for the use of affirmations, as well. There I was a new me ─ feeling different inside and out. Making that transformation equated with hard work and positive results. That’s when a light flickered (it’s book time), How many others have gone through a similar journey?
Originally, I wanted the book to be a companion to my memoir. After speaking with my publisher (Terri Leidich of WriteLife Publishing), we came to the conclusion that no one should have to read my storybook, Not a Blueprint, It’s the Shoe Prints that Matter, to do the work in this activity guide. Unfortunately, there are too many people out there who forfeit themselves through their journey, and don’t know where their self-love falls (i.e., lies). With that realization, we decided I needed to rewrite the material as a stand-alone. In all honesty, I thought it was going to be rather difficult. Yet, the more I’d gotten into the writing the easier it became to structure it.
What is one piece of advice you would give to someone who is struggling on the path to self-love?
I’m a strong believer in self-talk. Many know this talk as ‘those inner voices in the back of our heads that feeds us messages all day long.’ So, what I’d tell them is two-folded, “The use of daily affirmations plays an integral role in self-nurturing, Don’t give up on yourself!”
What is a common obstacle you find many people face when it comes to self-love?
There are several obstacles one faces when showering love on self. The major one which comes to my mind is, “We can always find the time to love on others. Rarely, do we take time out to love ourself. Think about that!”
What is the next book that you are working on and when will it be available?
Psst! Psst! . . .
Yes, I’m working on something. I’m a huge fan of those “true-life-stories.” That’s right, it’s one of those non-fictions and rather not reveal the full details, as yet. Be assured, it’s not a memoir. But, it’ll be a doozy ─ one that’ll knock your socks off and others’ as well.
To say the least, “It’s an eye-opener; with a splash of humor; and lots of heartbreaking moments.” I can share that much as I’m still pulling the research together.
With this one, there’s lots of research involved, which seems to be endless. At some point, I’ll have to cut it off and get busy with the writing phase.
When it’s ready for release, I’m confident many people will find this story relatable and embraceable with their interactions and what’s happening around society, today. All that’s involved in developing into a storybook, it definitely won’t be a release for this year. That’s for certain!
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Mirror, Mirror, On the Wall, Where Does My Self-Love Fall?: A Success Guide to Replace Toxicity with Love takes you on a journey of reflection. How are you living your life? Are you able to achieve your goals within the set time frame? How do you interact with others? Do you love and take care of yourself as you should? Is the environment you are in toxic? These and more questions are answered throughout the book. Nina Norstrom is here to tell the reader to love self, take life gently and make memories. This book has potent affirming power. When feeling low, the author knows which words to use to raise one’s spirits.
I appreciate Nina Norstrom for laying her life bare. The author talks deeply about her personal life and even invites the reader to walk the journey with her. By looking at life through Nina’s eyes, we get to see how beautiful the world is and how much disservice we are doing ourselves by not taking advantage of the good that the universe offers. This book is more than a self-help book. Nina Norstrom will help you grow into a well-rounded individual that will benefit society in many ways. One of the highlights of reading this book was connecting with the author when she narrated some of her experiences.
Certain chapters in the book made me connect deeper with the author. The chapters on toxicity in the work place, living healthy, relationships, emotional wellness, and toxic emotion were my favorites. In these chapters, the author is raw, and candid. The content in these chapters is eye opening and can be uncomfortable for some. By reading the text, I got to think of the toxic situations I was in, and how I probably enabled parties involved to be toxic. Nina Norstrom makes you feel like you matter. Your voice should be heard and your feelings are valid.
The author’s integrity and straightforwardness are a plus. Nina speaks her mind and does not mind. She is also objective in her writing and knows how to deliver a message gently. The author is charming and gives one time to process one piece of information before going to the next. There are multiple lessons in this book but the major lesson is about love. The author extensively writes about love for self, love for family, friends, and the people we interact with on a daily basis. This book will help readers love themselves more.
Pages: 89 | ASIN: B07BFGGM2N
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Posted by Literary_Titan
Not a Blueprint: It’s the Shoeprints That Matters is a very personal story for you. How hard was it to put this story out in the world for people to read?
Firstly, you must know that I grew up in a house full of secrets. Whatever went on in the family, we were taught to keep it in the home. So, as an adult and a single parent, I was compelled to live a secretive and private life. I made a practice to rarely reveal what was happening in our lives. Even back then, those that knew of me had very little knowledge about me.
Secondly, for many decades, my journey with toxic relationships was deep seated, raw, and buried inside me. What you have to realize, I kept it all in a diary. Never realizing I was exactly telling a story about our life that would one day become an opened book to others. Unknowingly, this writing was a healing medium that many may have called writing therapy.
Initially, during the editing phases, all I could do was cry, cry, and cry while trying to relive those painful and hurtful events. There was an instance, I recall when the editor and I had bumped heads; since I could not break through those raw emotions to express my thoughts clearly and precisely. It was extremely bad that the publisher had to intervene. After the conversation with her, she had me to take four days off to recover from that ordeal.
Finally, once we’d gotten back to the writing, I still couldn’t break through those unsettling emotions. It was then I came up with a conclusion to take the portion out. Therefore, I wrote in its chapter titled, Finding Peace and Comfort.
I appreciated the candid nature with which you told your story. What was the hardest thing for you to write about?
Truly, there were many challenging moments. The pain was just overly great and hurtful, I wanted to scream in an octave range; to the top of my lungs. But, I’ll share with you these crucial ones . . .
The challenges surfaced when writing about the guilt and steps taken into being someone’s mistress. Knowingly, the pain I had ‘cause another with the interference I’d made in their lives. And how horribly I’d abused myself by giving up my self-worth; self-dignity; and all those other self-dimensions one possesses. Through it all, I’ve come to realize we can be our worst abuser.
The most sharpening and piercing piece was writing the horrible news about my child. Being that parent and having to watch one so young go through a grown folk’s disease ─ can be the most devastating experience ever endured. It even breaks my heart (now) to write it here. You know, life can be so unfair? Yes, then again, whoever said life was fair?
You have to remember, I was reared in a Christian environment. So, once I let go of my religious and spiritual beliefs, there I was holding on to that poison of unforgiveness. It took decades to find my way through the darkness that kept me in a fixed space with an inability to move forward.
Finally, those years of experiencing losses took its toll traumatically, and overpowered me mentally. I had become a basket case. Surprisingly, I didn’t see that until it was on paper! To become housed living inside a world of trauma was not only terrorizing, but horrifying. Perhaps, that may be difficult for one to understand what it’s like − unless he or she has walked that journey.
What do you hope is one thing readers take away from your story?
Unfortunately, that’s a tough question, I can’t clearly say there is one thing but many . . .
It’s story speaks about the good, the bad, and the ugly stuff life throws at us. Not only that, it was raw and canned. Thinking about relationships, there’s no way to prevent an engagement with them. Every integral piece is a vital part of living, period.
Ultimately, it’s message will reveal the importance that life brings many challenges; with each there are lessons learned along the way. And with each relationship, one can learn to recognize whether it has a toxic or non-toxic impact. Flipping through those pages, it illuminates the beauty of love, compassion, courage, determination, and strength.
As an end result, I can only hope readers reach an enlightening height from the lessons learned while walking on the journey. And realize that the engagement of toxicity affects everyone in one form or another. But, know when walking, NO ONE walks alone!
What is a common misconception you feel people have about toxic relationships?
In many cases, it could be that some feel they’re making the wrong choices or poor decisions when it comes to unhealthy relationships. However, they fail to realize you don’t chose a toxic person, they chose you.
In another instance, some are failing to realize the dangerous effects their interactions play out. But first they must understand what is a toxic relationship? “A toxic relationship occurs when two or more people interact in a way that is detrimental to their life.” Or, “Anything that is poisonous and capable of causing sickness or death.” In either case, all one has to do is think about how deadly COVID-19 has impacted our lives, daily. With that in mind, it’s evidence that a toxic relationship becomes nothing to play.
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Relationships play a significant role in human experiences throughout life’s journey. Nina Norstrom, in her memoir Not a Blueprint: It’s the Shoeprints That Matters refers to the toxic relationships she lives, endures, and learns through as a daughter, mate, mother, and working woman. The reader is taken on the author’s journey as they follow the shoeprints she leaves along her life path and those left behind by many others in her life. By going along with these shoeprints, the by-products of her life, readers learn about her battle against toxic relationships in various forms.
There are seventeen chapters in the memoir, which begin with an account of the author’s life. In the first nine chapters of the book, the author describes her experiences and struggles with domestic violence, both as a child witness it and in her own personal relationships. Throughout the remaining chapters, the author vividly recalls, her experiences while dealing with the toxic relationship with cancer that invades the life of her angel, her daughter.
In addition to expressing the author’s diverse emotions, the book pays homage to Nina Norstrom’s daughter, who tragically succumbed to a diseased toxic relationship in her life. My experience as a reader was emotional, and I commend the author for being open about her feelings while letting the readers inside the usually restricted area of a person’s psyche. The poems written for the departed soul of her daughter are beautifully expressed, seeping out the multitude of emotions of a parent. Moreover, the other feelings expressed in the book, whether it’s grief, anger, or resentment towards certain people, fate, or God, are raw and genuine.
This inspirational non-fiction story recounts Nina Norstrom’s journey of grief, guilt, and anger at God, to the path of finding peace with the will of God. Apart from providing solid shoes with which one can walk the hard paths of life, God also accompanies His children as they leave their shoeprints along the life journey. In the end, four appendices provide support resources, centers, and reading materials for those who are caught up in toxic relationships and would like support.
Not a Blueprint: It’s the Shoeprints That Matter is a deeply personal memoir that is recommended for those who want motivation from a genuine account of a battle with toxicity and self-reflection in the aftermath of trauma.
Pages: 179 | ASIN : B016X198SO
Tags: abuse, author, book, book recommendations, book review, book reviews, book shelf, bookblogger, books, books to read, cancer, death, death and grief, divorce, dysfunctional families, ebook, goodreads, inspirational, kindle, kobo, literature, memoir, Nina Norstrom, non-fiction, nonfiction, nook, Not a Blueprint; It's the Shoeprints That Matter, read, reader, reading, religious, spiritual, story, trauma, writer, writing