Blog Archives

Don’t Wait Until It’s Too Late!

Debbie C. Miller Author Interview

Doing the Right Thing serves as a one-stop resource for readers navigating the task of assisting aging loved ones, offering practical tips, housing comparisons, checklists, and thoughtful advice to help families make informed, compassionate choices with less stress and confusion. Why was this an important book for you to write?  

In 1995, when I first started this journey, I learned so much through trial-and-error. I knew that if I was having problems with the quality and accuracy of people who work in the seniors’ field, I knew that other adult chilldren would find it frustrating, too. I wrote the book to educate and empower adult children to be advocates for their loved ones. I made it as easy as possible to find information quickly. No one has time to wade through a 400-page tome looking for the answers!

How have your personal experiences and background as a Certified Senior Advisor(CSA), Certified Aging in Place Specialist(CAPS), and as a real estate Associate Broker helped you to write this book?

I was already in real estate helping seniors and adult children sell the family home. I completed coursework to become a Certified Senior Advisor and Certified Aging-in-Place Specialist to learn even more! The designations provide useful information that is “book-learned” rather than “street-smarts”. Both approaches have helped me better serve others. I can relate to the stres and frustration an adult child feels, and the overwhelming emotions the loved one feels when facing this next phase of life.

What were some ideas that were important for you to share in this book?

(a). Each situation is unique to that person or family, but the resources to help are widely available;

(b). Learn and practice patience! Don’t try to “take charge” of your loved one’s situation. They may have already thought about it but are hesitant to discuss.

(c). Keep going! You do the best you can with what you have and it’s enough!

(d). Don’t hesitate to reach out for help

(e). You may think you have time but life (for you and your loved one) can change quickly! You can reschedule a meeting or change vacation plans, but a call about your parent(s) must be faced right away. 

What is one thing that you hope readers take away from Doing the Right Thing?

Don’t Wait Until It’s Too Late! Familiarize yourself with as much as you can! The process won’t be completed overnight! 

Author Links: LinkedIn | Instagram | X | Reddit

Not Sure What To Do Next?
Caring for a loved one is stressful, but necessary. I know, I’ve been there many times. There are new situations, new issues, and new decisions to make every day. When you don’t know what to expect or what questions to ask, it can be a frustrating feeling, and your emotions can often affect your decisions.
This book provides resources and information to guide you in caring for your aging loved one. The information includes information I wish I had known many years ago when I started my journey of caring for several relatives.
Here are a few things you’ll learn:
How to develop a master list of the information you need from your loved ones before they become incapacitated or die, and what steps to take once they pass.
The importance of a will or trust.
The types of housing choices for your loved one and how to decide what’s best.
The forty-plus questions to ask an assisted living facility.
How to decide what items to sell, donate, or give away. The twenty-five questions to ask an estate sale company.

Resources to ease your stress, especially if you don’t live close to your loved one. How to cope with grief.
By reading this practical guide, you can educate and empower yourself to do the best you can–before it’s too late!

Doing the Right Thing: Simple Solutions, Essential Tips & Helpful Resources for Assisting Aging Loved Ones

Reading Doing the Right Thing felt like someone finally handed me a flashlight in a pitch-black tunnel. I’m a full-time caregiver for both of my elderly parents. Dad’s mobility is limited, and Mom has early-stage dementia. I’ve been making it up as I go, bouncing between doctor appointments, financial headaches, and late-night worry spirals. This book didn’t just speak to me, it practically grabbed me by the shoulders and said, “Here’s what you need to know, and you’re not crazy for feeling overwhelmed.”

I appreciated how Debbie Miller lays it all out. Just clear, compassionate guidance. She covers everything from selling the family home to choosing between assisted living and aging in place, and she even dives into sensitive topics like wills, end-of-life planning, and grief. I found myself nodding, underlining, even laughing in a few spots, especially the parts where she talks about how stubborn parents can be when it’s time to downsize. Yes. Been there. Still there. Every chapter felt like it was written by someone who gets it.

This isn’t a “just think positive” kind of book. It’s honest. Some of the information is hard to take in, especially when you’re already stretched thin emotionally. But I needed that. I didn’t need another person telling me to “just enjoy this time.” I needed someone to tell me how to manage Medicaid paperwork, how to talk to my brother who lives five states away and still thinks our parents are “fine,” and how to keep from losing myself in all of it. Debbie did that.

If you’re caring for aging parents, especially if you’re doing it alone or with little help, Doing the Right Thing is a godsend. It’s part guidebook, part pep talk, part reality check. I keep it on the kitchen counter, next to the pile of prescription refills and to-do lists. It belongs there. I wish I’d read it a year ago, but I’m glad I have it now. And if you’re in the middle of this journey too, you’ll be glad to have it too.

Pages: 195 | ASIN : B0D7K72Y4S

Buy Now From Amazon

Doing the Right Thing: Simple Solutions, Essential Tips & Helpful Resources for Assisting Aging Loved Ones

Debbie C. Miller’s Doing the Right Thing is a heartfelt and practical guide for anyone navigating the daunting path of caring for an aging parent or loved one. Drawing from her years of experience as a real estate broker and Certified Aging in Place Specialist, Miller breaks down the vast, often overwhelming web of decisions. Whether it’s choosing the right type of housing, downsizing, understanding financial options, or simply knowing how to start the conversation. The book serves as a one-stop resource, offering practical tips, housing comparisons, checklists, and thoughtful advice to help families make smart, compassionate choices with less stress and confusion.

What struck me most was how deeply personal this book felt. Miller isn’t some detached expert. She’s lived this. Her tone is warm, conversational, and honest, like a trusted friend who’s been through the mess and wants to spare you the worst of it. She doesn’t sugarcoat how tough these decisions can be, especially when roles flip and adult children become the caretakers. The stories she includes from her own clients are raw and relatable. You can feel the anxiety, the guilt, the pressure, and also the deep relief and gratitude that come from getting it right.

There’s a lot of information packed in here. I found myself bookmarking sections and flipping back and forth, trying to absorb everything. That said, I appreciated that Miller didn’t assume readers know what questions to ask or where to begin. She anticipates confusion and meets it with clarity and structure. If there’s one critique I’d offer, it’s that the tone occasionally veers into lecture territory, especially in the more technical chapters. Still, that’s forgivable when the advice is this thorough and useful.

This book is a lifeline. If you’re an adult child facing the tough questions about how to care for your aging parents, or if you’re a solo ager trying to plan ahead, Doing the Right Thing will meet you with empathy, wisdom, and actionable steps. I’d recommend it for any adult over 40, whether you’re in the thick of caregiving now or just starting to sense those big decisions coming down the road.

Pages: 195 | ASIN : B0D7K72Y4S

Buy Now From Amazon

Are You Ready?: How to Build a Legacy to Die For

In Are You Ready? How to Build a Legacy to Die For, Dr. Kimberly Harms masterfully explores the profound concept of legacy through a blend of personal stories and practical guidance, aiming to inspire readers to lead lives of deep meaning. Across its chapters, Harms delves into themes such as love, resilience, hard work, faith, and preparation for death, all richly interwoven with her own experiences and those who have significantly impacted her life. Each chapter opens with motivational quotes and closes with actionable steps, rendering the book both reflective and pragmatic.

The book excels in personalizing the often abstract concept of legacy. Harms employs relatable narratives and vivid examples to animate the themes, fostering a connection between the reader and her journey, along with the valuable lessons she shares. The abundance of advice and stories in each chapter provides a wealth of insights. The later sections, which focus on preparing for death, are crucial and offer profound insights, providing readers with valuable guidance on this important topic. Dr. Harms writes with a heartfelt, conversational tone that readily engages the reader, making complex topics accessible and relatable. The practical tips concluding each chapter are particularly beneficial, providing clear guidance on how to apply the lessons to one’s own life. While the book covers a wide array of topics, from managing personal relationships to meticulous planning for one’s end-of-life affairs, it maintains a cohesive narrative centered on the importance of building a meaningful legacy.

Are You Ready? How to Build a Legacy to Die For is a compelling read that prompts readers to ponder deeply the legacy they wish to leave. It combines motivational discourse with practical planning, serving as a valuable resource for anyone aiming to enrich their life and the lives of those around them. It adeptly balances inspirational content with practical advice, though it occasionally grapples with pacing and density.

Pages: 302 | ASIN : B0CHG23HD5

Buy Now From Amazon

Helping the Next Generation

Kimberly Harms Author Interview

Are You Ready? How to Build a Legacy to Die For combines real-life stories with practical, actionable advice for readers to use when planning for their own deaths and estates. What were some goals you set for yourself as a writer in this book?

I wrote this book after suffering the loss of my mother and son to suicide and my husband to a broken heart after the death of our son.  Since, hopefully, I am the next in line to go in my family, I wanted to research and work to make sure my children and grandchildren were emotionally prepared for my death.  After quizzing my family and friends about their feelings about death and their preparedness for their own death, I believe that most of us are not prepared.  By getting ready for the time when we will no longer be in this world, setting our survivors up for success, and minimizing the conflict, complicated grief, and aggravation (when they have to get rid of our stuff or can’t find our important papers) they suffer, we can show our love to them beyond the grave.

I found part three, “The Death Prepper’s Workbook,” especially meaningful in drawing attention to the discussions that need to be had. Have you considered expanding this into a stand-alone workbook to help others with planning for the future? If so, what else would you include to help readers with this process? 

Actually, I have already written a stand-alone workbook and will be presenting a seminar to my church next week.  I hope to get two versions, one secular and one faith-based, soon.   With the workbook, I want to include envelopes to hold our birth certificates, marriage certificates, titles, etc., so that everything will be in one place.  Our children will thank us!!!

What is one thing that you hope readers take away from Are You Ready? How to Build a Legacy to Die For?

I hope that readers understand that we all have a purpose in life: helping the next generation to succeed and thrive when we are gone.   

Author Links: Facebook | Website

We all know the importance of life insurance to make certain our loved ones are financially secure after we pass on, but what can we do to ensure they are emotionally secure without us? Are You Ready? How to Build a Legacy to Die For is designed to help us do just that. It is a book in three parts.

Part One encourages us to focus our lives on building positive legacies such as love, peace, trust, education, and hard work. We will meet incredible people who have lived lives full of hope and resilience and have passed these traits on through multiple generations.

Part Two examines the process of death itself and asks the question: “Is death a grim or gentle reaper?” The fascinating research on near death experiences and life after death is explored with the understanding that this topic yields different beliefs.

Part Three is a workbook to help us prepare our loved ones for a life lived without us. It includes a complete checklist and discussion of traditional legacy documents such as a will, health care directive, and password record as well as an emotional life insurance plan to psychologically help our loved ones survive and thrive in a time when we are no longer
physically present with them. The workbook includes handy templates to encourage us to write legacy letters, reconciliation letters, and even a letter to help our survivors understand the mourning process.

Don’t wait to get ready. Our graduation from life comes unexpectedly. This book will help you be prepared to graduate with honors.

What’s your legacy?

Are You Ready? How to Build a Legacy to Die For

Are You Ready? by Kimberly Harms delves into the profound subject of living life meaningfully and preparing responsibly for its inevitable end. The book blends motivating personal stories with practical advice, encouraging readers to aim high while ensuring they leave as little burden as possible on others. For example, it shares anecdotes like that of Louise and Big Al, who supported their daughter’s theatrical ambitions and a consistently cheerful and efficient Northwest Airlines porter.

The narrative also includes Harms’ experiences, adding a personal and emotional layer to the book. She shares the sorrow of losing relatives to suicide yet draws strength from these tragedies to foster personal growth and resilience. This personal connection humanizes the broader topics discussed and enhances the book’s impact on its readers. Harms addresses the often taboo topics of death and preparation with clarity and logic, arguing for acceptance over fear.

The book is structured to guide readers through various preparations like decluttering, writing wills, and having crucial family discussions. Such content is designed to inform and prompt action, making the book a practical guide for those looking to organize their affairs. Interwoven with these practical elements are stories of extraordinary individuals and diverse themes, including art, mentorship, and healthcare directives. One particularly memorable story is that of Reme, who survived the Rwandan genocide by hiding in a tiny wood bin for nearly three months. These narratives add depth and a wide range of emotional and experiential layers to the book.

Are You Ready? is a compelling mixture of life-affirming stories and essential life-planning advice. It educates its readers on significant, often overlooked aspects of life preparation, from understanding the differences between wakes and funerals to embracing the full spectrum of human experiences. Kimberly Harms’ work is a commendable resource for anyone looking to enrich their life’s journey and prepare thoughtfully for its conclusion.

Pages: 302 | ASIN : B0CHG23HD5

Buy Now From Amazon

Are You Ready? How to Build a Legacy to Die For

Are You Ready? How to Build a Legacy to Die For by Dr. Harms tackles the profound yet often unspoken aspects of life’s journey—legacy, mortality, and the lasting impact we hope to leave. This work is an introspective guide that delves into the intricate dance between life’s beginning and end, acknowledging the chaos and beauty that define our existence. Dr. Harms addresses these themes with grace, articulating the dualities of love and pain, joy and sorrow.

In her exploration, Dr. Harms defines what legacy means by sharing compelling narratives of individuals who have turned adversity into opportunities for growth and compassion. These stories not only inspire but also challenge readers to reflect on their own legacies and the marks they wish to leave on the world. Dr. Harms embraces a variety of belief systems, emphasizing their validity and the universal truths that connect humanity—the cycles of birth and the inevitability of death. This book pushes the reader into sometimes uncomfortable but necessary contemplations about proactive legacy building, which can alleviate the burdens of uncertainty and grief for loved ones.

Dr. Harms encourages persistence, her writing style imbuing a sense of resilience and urging readers to continue despite discomfort. What sets this book apart is Dr. Harms’ compassionate and relatable storytelling. She injects her own experiences into the narrative, providing comfort and guiding readers towards making essential life decisions. Her gentle yet effective nudging is designed to move you from contemplation to action, leaving readers grateful for the encouragement to take proactive steps in legacy planning.

Are You Ready? How to Build a Legacy to Die For is clearly a labor of love, reflecting Dr. Harms’ commitment to thoughtful writing and genuine connection with her audience. Her message is poised to resonate with anyone pondering their impact on the world, making this book a valuable read for those seeking to understand the importance of crafting a meaningful legacy.

Pages: 302 | ASIN : B0CHG23HD5

Buy Now From Amazon