Why Don’t They Cry?: Understanding Your Living Child’s Grief by Zander Sprague (LPCC) is a book dedicated to parents who have lost a child, especially during childhood or early adulthood. Zander begins the book by piquing the readers’ interest with thought-provoking and interesting ideas about siblings. The relationships we have with them are often the longest-lasting relationships in life, but what happens if we lose a sibling at a young age?
Zander lost his older sister early in life and later dedicated his life to becoming a counselor helping people who have lost siblings. These individuals are often referred to as sibling survivors but are often the forgotten mourners years later while their grief continues to impact their lives. The survivors’ grief is often overshadowed by the anguish of their parents’ experience of losing a child. Siblings became the secondary mourners by default, which can bring about unique challenges, including how parents communicate with their surviving children, the healing process, and the side effects of loss, including divorce, marital stress, and family difficulties.
The book is written in a professional but compassionate tone. However, that does not take away from the emotions and stories shared in a beautiful, sensitive manner. It’s an emotional rollercoaster of love, sadness, grief, and reflection. I was impressed with the style of this book and how the author created a helpful guide for sibling survivors and recognized their pain, which is touching and important. It only took a few pages before I felt the full emotional impact of the book and the power of sibling bonds explained so well. I was deeply moved and left thinking about the process of grief and the complex journey of loss.
Why Don’t They Cry?: Understanding Your Living Child’s Grief by Zander Sprague (LPCC) is an excellent read for parents grieving the loss of a child. It’s a great book I recommend to professional child caregivers, counselors, psychologists, and teachers. It’s an essential read for anyone looking to support children or young adults through this harrowing loss. I can’t recommend this book enough!
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