Lunches with Ed is a moving memoir about loving someone through dementia—through home care, nursing homes, Covid windows, final goodbyes, and the small moments that never let go. At what point did you realize this story might help others beyond your own family?
I realized that this story may help others when an unbiased associate read it and became so emotional she called me up in tears expressing how deeply the book touched her. I later found out that she was in the midst of caring for her husband and the book was a comfort to her.
How did your understanding of love change as Ed’s dementia progressed?
I came to really understand the meaning of “in sickness and health”, “for better or worse”. Marital love does not just end because your spouse gets ill. Ed was the same person I loved and he needed me more now than ever. The journey has made me more empathetic and caring.
How did you balance honoring Ed’s dignity while sharing the strange or disorienting behaviors dementia caused?
I sought to portray Ed as the kind and caring person that he always was while trying to present a true picture and not sugar-coat the ebbs and flow of daily life living with dementia. His sensitive, peaceful nature was still there hidden underneath all the confusion. I sought out the best care for him and also tried to shield him from unnecessary intrusions and visitors who were only mere acquaintances.
How do you carry Ed with you now, after telling his story
I carry him in my heart. I think of the good times we had, the laughter we shared. Whenever I think of him I find myself smiling.
When a devoted wife stepped into the role of caregiver for her husband during his journey with dementia, she found solace in journaling — capturing the routines, challenges, and quiet triumphs of daily life. What began as a private coping tool became a heartfelt guide for others walking the same path. Lunches with Ed offers practical insights born from lived experience, not theory. It’s a gentle, honest companion for those navigating the emotional terrain of caregiving — validating the sadness, frustration, and fear that often come with it, while also celebrating the moments of laughter, connection, and unexpected joy. Compact and comforting, this book is designed to be kept close — on a nightstand, in a purse, or tucked into a drawer — ready to remind caregivers that they are not alone. Above all, it’s a tribute to the enduring love that caregiving calls forth, and the strength found in showing up, day after day.
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