In Suffering Leads to Hope, you assert through your own experiences and biblical references that by facing pain, we find its meaning and can begin a significant transformation. Why was this an important book for you to write?

I got to a point in my life where my emotional pain felt overwhelming. My stepdad died suddenly, my wife of 12 years divorced me, we lost our two baby girl embryos, my company was liquidated, and I was facing 15 years in Federal prison. I tried to avoid my pain with denial, drinking, and mental escapism–to no avail. Eventually, I realized that I had to live in my pain, wrestle with it, and surrender to it. It was in this posture of surrender that my relationship with God was finally able to blossom. Once I admitted my own limitations, my sins, and my character frailties, God could finally lead me on a path to spiritual transformation. 

Did you begin with a theological structure in mind, or did the structure emerge from your experiences?

While in prison, I was drawn to the Apostle Paul’s letters, especially the letters he wrote from prison. Paul was given 39 lashes multiple times, he has ridiculed, rejected, and stoned to the point of death. Yet, he still tells us to rejoice in our suffering. His guidance in Romans 5:3-4 created the foundation for this book: “We rejoice in our suffering because suffering leads to endurance, endurance leads to character and character leads to hope.”

Was there a particular stage—denial, anger, surrender—that was most difficult to move through?

Spiritual Transformation is not linear. I am thankful I have experienced significant spiritual growth, but I still struggle with denial, anger, bitterness, and surrender on a daily basis. These feelings remain present, but no longer control my thoughts, and I can easily release them. 

Yet, surrender is still a challenging spiritual discipline for me. I lived the majority of my life following my will as an assertive overachieving Wall Street professional. Taking my hands off the wheel of my life and handing over control to God was difficult, but it was incredibly rewarding. I finally feel at peace now following the singular example of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. He not only absorbs my sins, but he also carries my anxiety, pain, and suffering. 

What do you want someone in the middle of suffering to take from your story? 

Pain and suffering are important parts of our lives. I spent so much time avoiding my suffering by numbing it with alcohol, denying its existence, or filling my days with work to avoid reflection. By embracing my pain and understanding its purpose in my life, I realized it did not happen by accident. It was a necessary refining tool that has fundamentally changed my physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual existence. 

If you have the courage to confront your suffering and surrender it to God, it will transform you into the person God created you to be.

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