Coming of Age in Retirement is a funny, thoughtful, and eye-opening memoir-meets-social-commentary about stepping away from a high-powered advertising career and fumbling through the uncertain terrain of retirement. Why was this an important book for you to write?

​I was at the point in my life where I was trying to understand the intricacies of life in general and retirement life in particular. The more I thought about my existence, the less about it I understood. I was lost without my nearly 50-year career, my work-friends, the national TV commercials I wrote and directed, the production shoots that I executive produced, and my packed schedule that included more than 180,000 hours of work I had amassed. It wasn’t replaceable, and certainly not in an instant.

I took to heart the words of the Buddha, who said, “There is no path to happiness. Happiness is the path.” And that clicked with me. From that clickage came my new book, which is my path of revelation and enlightenment. I had heard time and again that the transition into retirement, for many, wasn’t as simple as it appears to be, so it was important for me to share my struggles, fumbles, and missteps in hopes that others might learn from my ineptitude.

What is one of the biggest misconceptions that social media and advertising try to convince people about retirement, and what is the fallout when the truth is revealed?

The misconceptions are so prolific, I barely know where to begin. But the takeaway for anyone, regardless of their age, is that the perceptions about retirement, in many shapes and sizes, are dictated to us — both positively and negatively — by advertising agencies and their employees, who, in many cases, are 25-year-olds. The irony is overwhelming that the impressions created about retirement are messages developed by juniors who know nothing about seniors. It’s sorrowful, but also damaging and damning. In my book, I prove this beyond any doubt.

So, what we have are either perceptions of retirement bliss, mostly in an effort to sell retirees something, either a product or a service, or retirement angst, also in an attempt to sell us something, but by way of fear of losing everything. There’s no effort to empower retirees, only a well-established effort to devour us.

There is prolific research that shows purposeful advertising impressions of seniors and the elderly to be incompetent, technologically incapable, lonely and sad, without purpose, and to be physically wrinkled, dotted with age spots, and even imagery of us drooling. This couldn’t be further from the truth. My retired friends, and I have hundreds of them, are probably in better shape than people I know who are half their age.

What were some ideas that were important for you to share in this book?

It’s difficult to whittle it down, but I think your Editor-in-Chief, Thomas Anderson, did an insightful job when he reviewed my book and wrote, “This isn’t a how-to. It’s not about finances and hobbies. It’s about getting honest with yourself. About reckoning with who you’ve been, who you might become, and what matters in the time you have left. For me, it was both a reality check and a relief.” I think that’s right.

And I also think we owe it to ourselves to be ourselves and not what we are supposed to be because of these myths and stigmas that surround seniors and the notion of what retirement is supposed to look like, which, incidentally, we think of as so American. In fact, most of what we know retirement to be is almost completely shaped by what retirement is in other countries and continents. I would also add that it’s important to find your path, not someone else’s, or some guidebook on how to retire happy. There’s no formula, no concoctions, and certainly no elixir that guarantees some sort of happiness spritzer.

What advice do you have for individuals approaching retirement or who have recently entered it?

Of course, the advice I’ve always given to people, whether it’s business advice, retirement advice, or matters of the heart, has always been, “Don’t take my advice!” That said, I will tell you that I’ve heard from dozens of people and reviewers who have received the ARC (Advanced Reader Copy) of the book that they wished they had read the book before they retired. I do remind them that it’s never too late.

Aside from the fact that this sounds swollen-headed, and I’m typically not that way, I would say read the book; there’s literally never been any book written about retirement the way this manuscript is written, and certainly nothing has ever been written about the history of retirement from the perspective of an ad man, the unblemished truth, supported by one fact after another, how our perceptions of retirement are not our own, and the notion of failure in retirement transitioning, my own, in such a raw and honest style.

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