Uncommon Strangers follows a writer and the men he creates as they confront family trauma, sexuality, masculinity, loneliness, and the difficult journey toward accepting themselves and the love others offer. Why did you choose to explore these themes through a combination of memoir and fiction?

I enjoy moving back and forth as author, narrator, character, and as a person in dialog with readers, taking them through multiple levels of experience as we engage in the creation of meaning. Mixing genres of memoir and short-story forms allowed me to explore my own past in a way that provides readers with the means to insert themselves in the underlying themes without feeling they are merely passive observers of a narrator’s story and confessions. My goal is always to reach toward the universals of the human experience and invite readers to reflect upon their own lives and their place within the human community and then to act upon their insights.

Dorr Reed functions partly as an alter ego and is himself a writer. What does that additional layer allow you to explore?

Dorr allowed me to step into the potential that is in people who others write off as odd or too far gone to spend time with, to help, and nurture. He wanders from place to place, drinks, uses drugs, won’t commit to anyone. And yet, his writing represents a depth of thought and feeling, a need for love and compassion that so many find missing in their lives. In many ways, he is what is left after the devastation of war and the disappointment that comes with learning that the values and beliefs he held as a young man are compromised by the decisions and behaviors of others. I see him as the potential that can be found when trust and unconditional love mitigate the trauma of living.

How do friendship and romantic love help the characters challenge the stories they have believed about themselves?

Friendship and human interconnection are essential ingredients of the human need for community and feelings of safety in living our lives. In many ways, at least for my generation of men, feelings that moved beyond friendship into romantic feelings for persons of the same sex produced a firestorm of hostility within the culture. The blatant messages we received were that we were sick, bad, perverted, terrible human beings worthy of beatings and death. The psychological restraints forced many of us to feel bad about ourselves and to think we had to fit in somehow, learn how to fit the images of masculinity available to us as presented by the majority. I think the stories I have created in Uncommon Strangers allow for my characters to learn earlier than I did that the only way to deal with being different is to accept that difference and find ways to be whatever we are, find people who love us and care for us, and go about the task of living, following our own unique dreams, and using our talents to help others become more accepting of differences among human beings. The bonds of friendship, love, and respect among the central characters provide the means for them to accept themselves and one another as men without labeling them according to their sexual proclivities.

What do you hope readers who have struggled with expectations surrounding identity, sexuality, or masculinity recognize in these characters?

The bottom line for me is that human beings learn to accept themselves and others for whatever they are without culturally imposed limitations related to issues of sex, race, creed, religion, skin color, sexual identity, or any other superficial restraints human beings use for sorting and feeling superior to others. I would hope that people who have struggled with identity, sexuality, or definitions of masculinity will find that they are not alone, that they are worthy human beings, that they have as much right to function in the world as anyone else, and that, though many people are still lost in myopic views of what it means to be human, those struggling with self-worth and identity can learn to accept that it is society at large that is the problem, not them! It took much of my lifetime to come to this conclusion. I hope my words help others long before too much of their lives have been spent.

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