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Successful Long-Term Relationship

Matthew Hess Author Interview

Quiet Love (& Growing It) is a practical guide blending science and social wisdom to help individuals cultivate lasting, fulfilling relationships through patience, growth, and quiet effort. Why was this an important book for you to write?

Everywhere you look, you find unrealistic depictions of what love is. Some people don’t have any examples of what a real, lasting relationship looks like and only see effortless or “romanticized” versions in movies or social media. It’s rare to find people who speak the truth about real love, how to find it, and most importantly, how to keep it.

What surprised you most while researching the science of love, and how can this understanding change the way people approach their relationships?

That there are actually formulas that make us more likely to fall in love, though it is more open-ended than one might think. Also, how quickly our subconscious can make judgments about another person after looking at them. It’s less than one second, though not always accurate for the purposes of a successful long-term relationship.

What advice would you give to couples who feel that their relationship lacks excitement but is still grounded in love and stability?

It sounds unromantic, but I wouldn’t suggest focusing on excitement at all. Excitement comes from the unknown, so as you learn more about each other, the excitement naturally fades. This is perfectly normal and okay, but if you expect it to last forever, you will always be looking for the next relationship. If you focus on consistent everyday actions and a shared purpose, the rest will fall into place toward a lasting and truly fulfilling relationship.

Which myth do you think is most harmful to relationships, and what steps can individuals take to reframe their thinking about love?

The No-Day Rule speaks about this, but anything like the “three-day rule” where you wait three days before contacting someone again after a first date. There’s nothing that will tangle the lines of communication more than things like these. And there’s nothing more attractive than someone who isn’t afraid to show competent and respectful interest in you.

Author Links: Goodreads | Website | Amazon

The award-winning author of Quiet Quit & Fully Live extends his “quiet” philosophy into the topic of love.
Do you long for a relationship that isn’t built on excitement and grand gestures but on the quiet, everyday moments? One that isn’t shaken by every challenge but strengthens over time through steady, purposeful love?
In a world full of lust, distractions, and short-lived passions, Quiet Love is your key to a deeper, more fulfilling connection.
Inside this book, you’ll find:
❤️ The 14 principles of “quiet love” that help sustain a relationship at any stage
💡 Insights into handling change to ensure your love grows together rather than apart through life’s unpredictable challenges
🗝 The 4 key factors that keep your relationship thriving in the long run
🙏 Simple but powerful gestures that show love in the smallest, yet most meaningful ways
🌱 How to cultivate shared experiences that deepen your bond and create lasting attachment
And much, much more—backed by 100+ references to scientific journals, articles, and studies.
With Quiet Love, you’ll discover how to nurture a relationship that feels grounded, genuine, and meant to last. Whether you’re single or married, young or experienced, Quiet Love offers timeless wisdom to fortify the foundations of your love life.
Start growing the love you’ve always wanted—click “Buy Now” and take the first step toward a lifetime of relationship success.

Quiet Love (& Growing It)

Quiet Love (& Growing It): 14 Rules to Find, Build, and Keep the Best Relationship of Your Life is an insightful and comprehensive guide to understanding, cultivating, and nurturing both your relationship with yourself and with your partner. Whether you’re single and seeking love, just starting a new relationship, or in a long-term commitment, this book offers practical tips on how to create happiness and satisfaction. Author Matthews Hess combines scientific insights with social dynamics, unraveling why we behave the way we do when in love and how we can harness these understandings to strengthen our relationships. He explores the idea of “quiet love,” a love that grows steadily, remains kind and supportive, and, though understated, is one of the most powerful forces in life.

Inspired by his own marriage to his wife Tessa, Hess presents 14 clear rules designed to foster a lasting relationship. What stands out in this book is its perfect blend of social cues, scientific explanations, and the debunking of popular love myths. Right from the start, Hess challenges the notion of “love at first sight” and instead emphasizes the importance of growing into love, a perspective that resonates deeply, especially for those familiar with the psychological intricacies of relationships.

One of the standout chapters delves into the chemistry of love, breaking down the neurological and hormonal processes that govern the three stages of love: lust, attraction, and attachment. Hess explains these complex biological mechanisms in a simple and approachable tone, making it clear that there’s much more happening in our minds and bodies during love than we often realize.

This isn’t just another book about gimmicks or seduction tactics to make someone fall in love with you. Instead, Hess focuses on the deeper aspects of love, how it evolves beyond initial lust and attraction, and how it can grow stronger despite the inevitable challenges. His honest and straightforward approach reveals that love is not just about fiery passion, it’s about the quiet and consistent effort that makes a relationship flourish over time.

Hess’s thoughtful and heartfelt guide is a must-read for anyone looking to strengthen their relationships, whether with a partner or with themselves. It’s a refreshing take on love that encourages growth, patience, and understanding.

Pages: 178 | ASIN: B0DFVTKGJC

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Prioritizing Your Own Well-Being

Author Interview
Matthew Hess Author Interview

Quiet Quit & Fully Live: Take Back Your Time, Energy, and Life Through Ethical Disengagement is a Self-Help book that advocates a realistic philosophy of work-life balance that is beneficial to employees and businesses. What is a common misconception you feel people have about the concept of Quiet Quitting?

The most widespread misconception seems to be that quiet quitting is unethical, or that it equates to slacking. And I get it—I had these same ideas initially. However, I quickly learned that quiet quitting is quite the opposite. Prioritizing your own well-being can make you a better worker who is more valuable to your employer.

How much research did you undertake for this book, and how much time did it take to put it all together?

I started jotting down initial ideas for this book a couple of years ago, but the process moved quickly once I actually sat down and started writing. A lot of the research was tied to topics I’d already been exploring personally, but I also actively searched for opposing viewpoints to challenge my perceptions.

What were some ideas that were important for you to share in this book?

It was important for me to share the right way to go about quiet quitting—the way that involves improving your own life and the lives of those around you.

What is one thing that you hope readers take away from Quiet Quit & Fully Live?

I hope readers come away with the ability to set and enforce boundaries that help them to live more balanced lives. This skill can be applied for anyone—not only for those who quiet quit.

Author Links: GoodReads | Amazon

If you have ever felt the weight of overstretched commitments, sacrificing precious time with loved ones or neglecting your own well-being in the relentless pursuit of success, you are not alone.

Picture this: an office that never sleeps, where the glow of computer screens outlasts the setting sun, and where family dinners become distant memories. This was my battleground. As I trudged through my sixth year of static titles and stagnant growth, the birth of my son refracted my life’s priorities through a kaleidoscopic lens of urgency.

The impact? A realization that the extra mile I’d been running was a loop leading nowhere, and it was time to step off the track. What followed was a reclaiming of time and dignity, sparking a transformation that would ripple through both my personal and professional worlds.
As we embark on this journey together, we will explore:
The devastating effects of long-term stress on the brain
The power of setting internal boundaries
The art of saying “no” without guilt
The transformative impact of prioritizing your personal life over work

I invite you to challenge the status quo, embrace ethical disengagement as a means of self-preservation and empowerment, and ultimately, quiet quit in order to fully live.

Quiet Quit & Fully Live: Take Back Your Time, Energy, and Life Through Ethical Disengagement

Book Review

Quiet Quit & Fully Live: Take Back Your Time, Energy, and Life Through Ethical Disengagement by Matthew Hess is a thoughtfully crafted examination of the modern workplace concept known as “quiet quitting.” Hess takes an in-depth look at this idea, which involves doing just enough to remain employed without going above and beyond. The book offers a multifaceted exploration of its ethical and practical aspects in today’s work culture. Hess begins by defining “quiet quitting,” setting it apart from simple underperformance. He challenges common misconceptions and advocates for a balanced approach to work and life. His argument suggests that “quiet quitting” could enhance job satisfaction and open doors to new opportunities, all while maintaining professional standards and employer relationships. The book argues that this practice is not about shirking responsibilities but rather about a mindful engagement with the defined responsibilities of one’s role.

The author’s discussion on the effects of stress and burnout, with a focus on brain health and the utilization of brain plasticity to mitigate stress, is particularly enlightening. This scientific perspective brings a fresh and valuable angle to the topic. Hess also delves into personal fulfillment and goal setting, offering insightful advice on pursuing individual ambitions. He makes a compelling case that embracing a “quiet quitting” mindset can create space for personal interests, strengthen relationships, and foster mental health. A standout section of the book is on establishing personal boundaries. Hess provides practical advice on how to set and enforce these boundaries, an essential skill for anyone aiming to balance work and personal life effectively.

Quiet Quit & Fully Live is a comprehensive guide that blends personal stories, case studies, and psychological insights to offer a nuanced perspective on “quiet quitting.” The book stands out as a valuable resource for those reevaluating their work-life approach, advocating a philosophy of balance that is both realistic and beneficial. Its insightful and accessible content makes it a recommended read for anyone facing the challenges of today’s work environment.

Pages: 88