Perfect: A Path to Love, Forgiveness and Transformation illustrates the ways in which the Universe orchestrates our lives toward a state of healing, wholeness, and love. Why was this an important book for you to write?

For most of my life, I was plagued by feelings of being different, unworthy and not enough. On this journey, I learned that the stories we create around the events of our lives are not always true – the mind does not always tell the truth! Our stories, labels and judgements act as a giant filter that paints the way we see the world. The world is as we are. Our fears and doubts are manifested into reality in the people and circumstances of our lives. The imperfections we see in others is often a reflection of the burdens we carry within ourselves. By learning to let go of the stories and labels that no longer served me, I was able to experience each moment through the eyes of love where there is no judgement. I am now able to experience greater levels of freedom, joy and happiness. When I look out into the world, I see so many people struggling with the same feelings and fears that I did. I know that we no longer need to live that way!

When we let go of our stories, labels and judgements, we see everything through the eyes of love – where there is no separation.

What is one piece of advice you would give to someone that is struggling to forgive?

There are so many different definitions of forgiveness. For me, it is really simple. Forgiveness means to forgo or to let go of. Painful and unwanted events are going to happen to all of us. We can either experience the event once or we can play it over and over again in our minds until it becomes stuck – it becomes our identities and then we become too afraid to let it go. I believe the most dangerous part of an unwanted event is not the event itself but the stories we create about the events.

When we forgive, we are not condoning the actions that might have hurt us. Forgiveness is a gift we give to ourselves. It is an act of self-love. It allows us to release negative, contracted energy that we are holding in our bodies and allows us to move forward. It also allows us to move beyond the stories we may have created. It frees us so we can experience true freedom and happiness.

Also, what if we stepped back and saw our lives from a grander, larger perspective? If we looked at our lives from that 1,000-foot view, what would we see? How would all the events of our lives weave together to tell a much larger, richer story? Can we see how the events of our lives might actually be serving us?

It is often difficult to see how traumatic events are serving us. However, it is in the contrasts of life that we gain clarity on what it is we want and don’t want – and in that clarity we create.

On earth, we experience everything – the good and the bad; the light and the dark; and the ups and the downs. In our most difficult moments, we often gain clarity on what we do not want. The contrast creates the clarity and from that clarity we create the laws to protect us, the inventions to make our lives easier or the life that we desire.

What if the contrast creates the clarity that then creates the expansion or change that we desire?

What were some ideas that were important for you to explore in this book?

Life is meant to be experienced in our bodies as feelings without labels, rather than through the stories created in the mind.

The essence of who we are is love. As love, our purpose is to expand and to create, for we are the creator of our lives. The reason we are here, alive, is to experience who we are and to learn to choose love in every moment.

Forgiveness is letting go of the contracted negative stories and energies that no longer serve us so we can move forward and experience true joy and happiness. It is a gift that we give ourselves. It is an act of self-love.

As humans, we have over 60,000 thoughts a day and 85% of them are quite negative. We are hardwired to notice the negative aspects of life as it was critical for our survival thousands of years ago. We no longer need to operate on autopilot. We need to become aware of our thoughts and disrupt the ones that are no longer serving us. We need to scratch that record so it can no longer play! One of the most precious gifts we have as humans is our ability to be aware.

The mind creates stories that are not always true. The body tells the truth. After an event occurs, it only takes us 90 seconds to process that event through our body as sensations and then let it go. After those 90 seconds are up, it’s up to us. We can either let it go or begin to create a story.

Our bodies are infinitely intelligent and often hold the trauma that we’ve experienced. Whenever I feel a contraction in my body, I say thank you. It’s our bodies way of saying that there is something to heal and be released. It is the same in the world today – the contraction and division that we are experiencing is the Universe’s way of telling us that there is an opportunity to heal.

The science of epigenetics has shown that not only do we inherit physical traits from our parents through our DNA – we can also inherit the pain and trauma that our ancestors experienced. Many indigenous cultures believe that when we heal, we heal seven generations back and seven generations forward. When we heal, we are not just doing it for ourselves – we are doing it for all who go before and after us.

What do you hope is one thing readers take away from your book?

Our greatest superpower is the power to choose. In every moment, we decide. It is in these momentary decisions that we create our lives.

In that space between stimulus and response, we decide how we respond. We choose our reaction and the stories that we create. We also have the power to not create a story at all or to learn to let them go. We are that powerful!

In every moment, we can choose love or we can choose fear. When we choose fear, we are living in the past, hoping to change what has already been. When we choose fear, we are focusing on what we don’t want in the future. So why not focus on the present and appreciate the moment.

We are more powerful than we can imagine because we have the power to choose how our lives will unfold in every moment!

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