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Creating Community
In The Break, you share with readers your experiences battling addiction and codependency and offer an intimate look into the unraveling of your marriage. Why was it important for you to write this book?
It was important for me to write The Break and share my experiences with codependency as my ex-husband and I came to terms with his alcoholism because I remember how alone I felt as I looked for community and understanding. I found more stories of people becoming sober than I found of those caring for someone going through alcoholism. The examples of alcoholism that were readily available were stories of various forms of abuse, mood swings, police interactions, empty bank accounts and houses built on fear. None of that was my story and I wanted to show others what high functioning alcoholism can look like. As I looked for my community, I realized there were more programs to assist the individual going through addiction than there were to help guide the loved ones. Alcoholism is a full life disease – it affects family, friends, co-workers and acquaintances – so I found it very odd that there was not just as much support for those around the alcoholic. I wanted to add to that community and that conversation because we, the co-dependents, need a strong support system as well.
I appreciated the candid nature with which you told your story. What was the hardest thing for you to write about?
The hardest part for me to write about was our wedding and accepting the fact that I really didn’t want to get married at the age of 25. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to marry my now ex-husband, it’s simply that I felt like I was up against societal standards and I was behind. I felt like I needed to get married because it was the next right step. Yes, I loved my now ex-husband and I should not have gotten married. While it was the next right step based upon societal measures, it was not the next right step for me and I was too young and too scared to recognize that truth.
What is one piece of advice you wish someone had given you when you were younger?
There is a lot of advice that I wish my younger self had been told, however it does not mean I would have been ready to accept it. If someone had told me that I didn’t have to get married, that there is always another way and to make sure I take the time to listen to myself, I can’t say I would have fully listened to them or understood what they meant. Especially since all the women close to me modeled a very different belief system. Even the women in the news were heralded more for their looks and who they were dating, than the accomplishments they created on their own.
What is one thing you hope readers are able to take away from The Break?
The biggest take away that I hope readers carry with them after reading The Break,is to give that inner voice space. Take the time to listen to the quiet nudging and pulling that says Try this or Are you sure?. It can be scary to give that voice a chance to be heard, especially if she’s been quieted for so long, AND it will be very worth it.
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This quieting leads us towards a life out of alignment with our truest and most authentic selves. This leaves us feeling anger, exhaustion and constantly stuck. A life the author was too familiar with as she struggled to accept her then husband’s alcoholism and the part she played in the cycle.
The Break is a story of Brandee’s unlearning, seeking truth and finally allowing herself to trust her inner own knowing. The journey back to herself was not easy and it was completely necessary. This story is shared with the hope it will guide you back to your own inner knowing as well.
Themes in this book include:
Addiction
Separation
Learning to trust ones self
Strengthening your inner knowing
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The Break: Rediscovering Our Inner Knowing
The Break is a raw and soul-baring memoir about the unraveling of a marriage caught in the quiet storm of high-functioning alcoholism and the slow rebirth of a woman learning to trust her own voice. Brandee Melcher takes readers on an intimate, winding journey through love, codependency, addiction, motherhood, and self-liberation. The book is structured in short, potent chapters that trace the trajectory of her life — from a childhood shaped by domestic violence to a marriage strained by denial and rules designed to fix what couldn’t be fixed. With startling honesty, Melcher offers readers not a step-by-step how-to, but a companion in the dark. This is a book about listening to the gut, especially when the heart wants to pretend everything is fine.
I enjoyed Melcher’s writing. I liked how sharp and tender it is all at once. She doesn’t hide from the uncomfortable. She walks right into it, like in Chapter 7, “The Long Ending,” where she describes the heartbreak of discovering that her husband had lied about drinking. Her rage, disbelief, and exhaustion are palpable. And yet, she never lets herself or the reader off easy. She owns her part, too — the enabling, the rationalizing, the excuses, the countless “rules” in Chapter 4 that were made and broken. There’s no polish here. No clean endings. Just someone standing in the ruins of what she thought marriage should be, slowly sweeping up the truth. I felt her weariness. I felt her clarity when she says, “It became too much to keep up with… and I was tired of the discussions.” That kind of fatigue isn’t just emotional — it’s physical. And she writes it like it is.
And then there’s the bravery — not just in leaving, but in staying so long and still trying. In Chapter 10, “Soul Break,” Melcher recounts the moment her partner admitted he drank simply because “he wanted to.” There’s no villain here, only a man in pain and a woman who couldn’t carry both of their stories anymore. I admired how she didn’t demonize him. She held grief in one hand and compassion in the other. And in doing that, she gave readers permission to feel both at once, too. Melcher’s ability to distill big, messy truths into plainspoken sentences is one of her greatest strengths.
This isn’t a book for people looking for easy answers or perfect closure. But if you’ve ever doubted your own instincts, if you’ve stayed too long, if you’ve bargained your way through a relationship thinking “at least he doesn’t…” — then The Break will feel like a mirror and a lifeline. I’d recommend this book to anyone healing from emotional exhaustion, codependency, or the quiet heartbreak of unspoken truths. Especially women. Especially mothers. Melcher’s voice is a steady hand on the shoulder — one that says, “You’re not crazy. And you’re not alone.”
Pages: 83 | ASIN : B0CH94Q63N
LITERARY TITAN 