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I Wasn’t Alone
The Trauma Monster shares your story of looking into the unsolved murder of your childhood friend, and through the investigation and with the knowledge you gained as a trauma therapist, helped your community heal. Why was this an important book for you to write?
The Trauma Monster was never just about writing a book. I was not a writer by profession but I decided to learn to write so I could help others deal with longstanding trauma. It was also about breaking a silence that’s hung over my community, and over my own life, for decades. I grew up with unanswered questions, carrying the weight of childhood loss, violence, and unresolved grief. When someone you cared about is murdered, as my first crush, Scott Leishman, was, and the case goes unsolved, the trauma doesn’t end. It lingers, it shapes one, and it shapes the town around each of us that was affected.
This book was my way of finally giving voice to the pain that was hidden for too long. But it’s also a book about hope. It is about how, even after decades, people can come together to seek truth, to heal, and to demand answers. Writing The Trauma Monster allowed me to honour the victims, amplify the voices of those who were silenced, and show others that healing is possible, even when justice feels out of reach.
What were some ideas that were important for you to share in this book?
There are three important ideas that I hoped my book described. First, I wanted people to understand that trauma doesn’t just belong to the families of victims, it eventually ripples through entire communities. When a murder goes unsolved, it leaves behind more than grief. It leaves fear, silence, and shame. I saw that in London, Ontario, and I carried it personally with me for decades.
Sometimes, families didn’t want the investigation stirred up again. They were grieving in their own way, or protecting themselves from more pain, which is their right. But that silence didn’t stop the hurt, it just pushed it underground for everyone else. Friends, classmates, shopkeepers, neighbours and others, we all were left with unanswered questions, and nowhere to put their pain.
Second, I wanted to show that unsolved murders aren’t just cold files, but actual human stories. The victims weren’t statistics; they were kids I went to school with, the boy I once had a crush on. They had dreams, fears, favourite songs. Their stories deserved to be told, and with dignity, with truth.
Third, I wanted people to know that healing is possible, but it starts with facing the past. It starts with stories being told, even the uncomfortable ones. Even when justice feels impossible, we can still reclaim our voices. Silence may have protected some, but it also trapped many others. It’s time for the silence to end.
What was the most challenging part of writing your book, and what was the most rewarding?
The most challenging part of writing The Trauma Monster was carrying other people’s pain, and recognizing my own pain, at the same time. I spent years listening to stories that were buried for decades, including stories of violence, fear, and loss. Some of those were my own stories too. There were moments I’d sit at my writing desk and think, I can’t do this because it’s too heavy, too heartbreaking. But I also knew that staying silent wasn’t an option anymore, not for me, and not for the community.
Another challenge was navigating the delicate reality that not everyone wanted these stories reopened. Some families, understandably, wanted the past to stay buried. I had to find a way to respect that, while still standing up for the friends, classmates, neighbours, meaning the rest of us who’d been living with unanswered questions and hidden trauma all this time.
The most rewarding part, without question, was seeing what happens when people finally feel heard. I’ve had survivors, classmates, even complete strangers tell me that reading The Trauma Monster made them feel less alone. For the first time, their fear, their grief, even their anger, was seen, validated and understood. That’s why I wrote it. Not to stir up pain for the sake of it, but to remind people that silence doesn’t heal, but truth, connection, and shared stories can.
How has writing this book impacted or changed your life?
Writing The Trauma Monster changed my life in ways I didn’t expect. It gave me back my voice and not just as an author. It gave me a way to tell my own story as someone who grew up carrying unanswered questions and unspoken grief. For decades, I thought I had to live with the silence. I thought that’s just how it was because people didn’t talk about these murders, and the pain stayed tucked away in the corners of our lives.
But the more I researched, the more I listened to other people’s stories, the more I realized how many of us had been carrying the same weight. Writing this book showed me that I wasn’t alone. More importantly, I didn’t have to be quiet anymore.
It also connected me with people I never would have met otherwise, including other survivors, families, citizen sleuths, even people from my own past I lost touch with. Some of them shared their memories for the first time in 50 years. That’s powerful.
Most of all, it reminded me that healing doesn’t come from pretending nothing happened. It comes from telling the truth, even when it’s messy, even when it’s hard. Writing this book helped me face my own trauma, honour the people we lost, and finally believe that it’s not too late for change or for answers, or for a community to begin healing together.
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The Trauma Monster: A Healing Journey through the Untold Cold Case Stories Of One Ontario Community
The Trauma Monster is a gut-wrenching yet hopeful book that weaves together personal memoir, true crime investigation, and trauma therapy insights. Set in Ontario during the 1960s and ’70s, the book begins with the unsolved murder of the author’s childhood crush, Scott Leishman. That loss becomes the starting point for a wider exploration into a series of cold cases that haunted the community and left lingering emotional scars. Through firsthand accounts, interviews, and years of therapeutic work, Dorrington tells the stories of survivors, people who were children during those years and never had a chance to speak. At its heart, the book is about the long reach of trauma, the silence it breeds, and the healing that comes when people feel safe enough to speak.
There’s a raw honesty to Dorrington’s voice that pulled me right in. She doesn’t write from a distance. She’s not an outsider poking around in someone else’s pain. This was her town. These were her friends. She opens herself up on every page, and that openness gives the book its power. The writing is simple, which works here. No need for flowery prose or academic terms. At times, the book left me breathless. She paints the ’60s in vivid detail. The crime scenes aren’t sensationalized, but they do haunt. I kept thinking about the kids who didn’t come home. The way Dorrington connects personal grief with collective trauma is what makes this more than a true crime book.
What surprised me most was how tender it is. For a book about murder and silence and shame, there’s so much care here. Dorrington is a trained trauma therapist, and it shows, not in technical talk, but in how she handles each story with compassion. She gives voice to people who were never asked to speak. Her inclusion of art, storytelling, and even a workbook makes the book not just a record but a tool for healing. I found myself thinking about my own losses, my own unspoken stories. That’s the kind of impact this book has. And still, she doesn’t tie anything up neatly. She’s not pretending these wounds close easily. The monster, as she calls it, never disappears. But it can shrink. It can be drawn, faced, and named.
This book is not just about old murders or sad memories. It’s about witnessing. About telling stories that were hidden too long. I’d recommend The Trauma Monster to anyone who’s been through something hard and is still trying to name it. It’s not an easy read, but it’s a comforting one. If you like true crime with heart, if you’ve felt unseen or unheard, or if you’re trying to heal, then this book is for you.
Pages: 297 | ASIN : B0F7D6SCL8
LITERARY TITAN 