What Not to Forgive follows ordinary people struggling with the harsh realities of life and trying to do the right thing, even when it is hard and complicated. What was the initial idea behind this story, and how did that transform as you were writing the novel?

As a boy, I was a hero worshipper of my six uncles and father who served in WWII. I had hopes of serving in the military too. In college ROTC, I was recognized for my academic achievement and leadership potential. But a pretty dramatic neurological condition got in the way of my military dreams. On Veteran’s Day in 2018, I was inspired to write this book after watching a young Army veteran who served in Afghanistan sprint two hundred meters on his prosthetic running blade at my gym. I was disabled by my “neurodiversity” and he by serving our country. He was inspiring because what he had sacrificed did not hold him back.

I experienced some mystical force that morning that compelled me to talk with this man. What was his story? Would he be willing to share it? I’ve learned over time that many veterans don’t want to talk about their time in war. I was lucky this man did. We bonded immediately and he agreed to be interviewed at my home. During our first interview, he described in vivid detail the events that led up to him stepping on a landmine in Afghanistan. I found no anger or resentment in his voice … only the pride of serving his country. There came a part in the interview that he wanted me to know … that in Afghan there is no word for forgiveness. Yet, he had forgiven the terrorists for what happened to him. I immediately knew I had a story to tell.

It is often said that writing is more cathartic for the author than the reader. It was true for me because I had discovered that writing What Not To Forgive was a way to pay my respect to those who served, while not being able to do so myself. What I learned was that forgiveness, far from being easy, is complicated. I believe it is the highest form of love we can aspire to.

Your characters’ emotional depth stands out and allows readers to connect with their journeys. What ideas were important for you to personify in your characters?

I wanted my characters to be relatable, ordinary people who show humility and be able to examine their flaws. Each character had choices to make. Sometimes they struggled and faced the consequences of their actions. Throughout the book, I wrote with disarming honesty. This, I believe, contributed to each character’s emotional depth.

What were some themes that were important for you to explore in this book?

The theme of forgiveness was foremost because it is complex. Forgiveness doesn’t mean just saying the words as many think. Forgiveness is an active, conscious act to let go of bitterness and resentment. Sometimes people think they have forgiven but they forgive the wrong way. They carry the grievance with them forever, though they think they let it go. What Not To Forgive is a work of fiction, but of course, it’s autobiographical too, in the ways that novels often are, by the people we have known and cared about, and cities and towns where we’ve lived our lives.

I suffer from a neurodivergent condition, similar in some ways to my character Frank Oglesby in What Not To Forgive. Though not life-threatening, I have experienced, over the course of a lifetime, the burden of exclusivity that comes from a socially awkward, sometimes embarrassing condition. I wanted to show, by way of Frank, that people who don’t understand can be scared and make false judgments. Seek to understand before being understood is one of Stephen Covey’s habits of highly effective people.

With Tekla, I wanted to explore how a young woman, who “had it all,” sought not to waste her gift of languages. She chose to keep up the family tradition of serving in the military. What price would she have to pay? There were safer ways she could have served her country. But she didn’t.

In her words, “she doesn’t suffer from PTSD but is bothered by it.” The blast from the landmine blew off one leg below the knee. She has scars she cannot feel while others are embedded in her soul. She is prone to look back on her “last normal day.” PTSD has her experiencing panic attacks and attachment issues. I wanted her to be challenged in her own path to forgiveness. Along that path I had a desire for her to experience love, a feeling she thought was buried in her past.

Friendship among characters is portrayed with not just honesty but also with loyalty.

What is the next book that you are working on, and when can your fans expect it to be out?

That is a good question. It took four years to write my first book, a memoir, Montana Epiphany. The next six years were devoted to writing What Not To Forgive. Launching a new book into the world has taken time away from writing. That doesn’t mean I haven’t been thinking about my next book. What I’m mulling over is a book of short stories, about Montanans and the tough, dangerous work some do. I would write again using Montana as a canvas and focus on occupations that are unique to Montana … a smokejumper … a Butte miner or a helicopter pilot who flies rescue missions into the Montana backcountry. Four years is a reasonable timeline before I’d likely publish another book. There is always a chance that one spark of the right inspiration could lead to another novel.

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