Reign: A Guide to Ruling Your Inner Kingdom of Self with Grace, Power, and Authenticity provides readers with insights and tools they can use to live a balanced and joyous life. Why was this an important book for you to write?

I believe small changes in our patterns of living can have a profound, positive impact. I saw a clear example of this while on vacation. As a family we love to travel and have taken two separate, weeklong bus tours that highlight different cities and sights. One of these trips was a small tour group of about twenty fellow tourists, all of whom were complete strangers to us. The first day we boarded the bus, everyone took a seat and introduced themselves to those around them. As the trip progressed, the same seating routine continued, and everyone sat in the same seat that they had the first day. By the end of the trip, we had become good friends with those seated around us. We shared meals, looked out for one another on excursions, and exchanged contact information to keep in touch. However, there was a part of our group that sat farther from us on the bus that we didn’t get to know.

The other trip we took was with twice the number of tourists and therefore a much larger bus. The first day we boarded with our travel companions (again all complete strangers), we took seats that were open. The second day, like the other trip, everyone sat in the same spot as they had the day before. This time, however, our tour group leader announced that we were to change up our seats each time we boarded by moving in a clockwise direction (if seated on the left side of the bus you moved up one row from your previous seat, and if seated on the right side of the bus you moved your seat back one row). After his announcement, there was a moment of quiet, stunned silence as people digested his request. There was some whispered grumbling as people collected their things and changed seats. Once we were settled, he asked that we introduce ourselves to those new faces around us. As this trip continued, we followed this seating rotation and met every person in our group. By the end of the trip, we knew everyone’s names, where they were from, had shared laughs, told stories, and enjoyed at least one meal with each of them. On this trip contact information was exchanged with all of our fellow bus passengers as everyone wanted to keep in touch. I greatly enjoyed both bus trips but found that the second trip, even though it was twice the group size as the first, was a much warmer inclusive one by virtue of the simple act of changing seats.

Like taking the same seat on a bus or in a classroom, we can easily find ourselves following a particular pattern out of habit. It can be uncomfortable to change that pattern. The ancient Chinese observed however that life is change. I think that there is a huge opportunity in that teaching. Small changes can create greater ease and a more enriching life. I wrote this book to offer an exploration of our power to change.

In the book you describe the five elemental realms. What is a key aspect you feel is important to learn when studying these realms?

The five elemental realms represent the changing seasons on earth as seen by the ancient Chinese (winter, spring, summer, late summer, autumn) and the emotions that they associated with each of those seasons (fear, anger, joy, sympathy, grief). Just like the seasons follow a continuous loop of change, we should also keep moving forward in life. For example, a cozy parka may be a favorite item of clothing on a freezing, winter day but would be uncomfortable to wear and look silly if worn on a hot, sandy beach. It is important to live each moment fully but then surrender it to the past as an opportunity for growth and learning. Trying to stay in a particular moment in time, habitual pattern or emotion, can hold you back from your life’s journey. This is like holding on to anger that eventually leads to a grudge, which over time, ends up hurting you more than the person who may or may not know they have wronged you. The five realms represent emotions and actions that are available to each of us on our human journey. To live our lives fully, we should experience and visit all five realms (emotions) but keep moving through them so as not stay stuck in one place.

What is your professional experience in the clinical field and how has that helped you write this book?

I have treated many patients in a variety of clinical settings. My greatest learning from both my studies and treating patients is that our bodies are wise, and they never lie to us. When there is discomfort, it is important to tune in and respect what our bodies may be telling us. At times, the cause of our discomfort is within our control. It may be lifestyle choices (diet, exercise etc.) or it may be thought choices. Often, I would hear similar stories from my patients (Ex. my mother-in-law is mean). Stories that we tell ourselves can trap us in like a box and limit our life experience. If we have the courage to learn a different story it can alleviate a lot of stress (Ex. my mother-in-law is mean because she is unhappy with her life choices and that has nothing to do with me). Of course, everyone’s situation is different, but I think that there is space in each person’s life for small shifts that can foster greater ease and contentment.

Do you have plans to write other books on this same topic?

I don’t have plans at this time to write another book but have toyed with the idea of a podcast. I think we all have beautiful soul stories to tell of how change has impacted our lives. I’d like to offer a forum to hear from those who have had the courage to change something for the better and the difference it has made for them. I think we can all learn from those teachers.

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