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Hope is Real
In Starving for Acceptance, you share with readers your personal struggle with eating disorders and body image issues and the hope that emerged after your hard-fought battle. Why was this an important book for you to write?
This book reflects the core values in its Mission Statement: breaking the silence around men’s struggles with eating disorders, body image, and low self-esteem. These challenges often go unspoken due to stigma, denial, and shame, leaving many to suffer in isolation. My purpose was to let those who are struggling know they are not alone—that help is possible, and hope is real.
I appreciated the candid nature with which you told your story. What was the hardest thing for you to write about?
The hardest thing for me to write about was revisiting the painful nature of living with an eating disorder. It has been a number of years since I dealt with Ed to the extent and depth that I was compelled to do in the memoir. For the book to be relatable to others, I felt vulnerability and honesty were essential.
What is one misconception you believe many people have regarding eating disorders?
I believe most people are under the impression eating disorders are the territory of adolescent, white, middle-class females. Period. Nothing could be further from the truth. Eating disorders cross all racial, gender, and economic brackets. Males constitute over 30% of all eating disorders, and even that may be grossly understated due to the stigma and shame of their silence.
Another big misconception is that there must be a single cause for the disease. We are complex beings, thus there is no easy answer. It is a complex issue comprised of any combination of physical, emotional, and environmental factors, including low self-esteem, perfectionism, depression, and feelings of being unworthy.
What do you hope is one thing readers take away from your story?
My wish is that the reader will derive hope and a deeper understanding of the process they are going through. Eating disorders are difficult to deal with. The sooner someone can identify they have disordered eating (such as constant food and body image thoughts, rules, and rituals) and the sooner they seek help with a therapist, family member, or trusted friend, the more likely they are to find peace within themselves. Silence is the killer. Trying to ignore the symptoms is no better. Recognizing the growing disorder and taking action is where the recovery begins.
Author Links: GoodReads | Amazon
I never would have believed that most of my life would be dominated by the challenges
of an eating disorder. Why do individuals develop eating disorders? There are certain threads
that bind those wrestling with disordered eating: the weight of anxiety and darkness from
depression; the pursuit of perfection; the onus of low self-esteem; and the constant ache of high
sensitivity.
These emotions and traits can intertwine, leading to a dance with obsessive-compulsive
disorder, cloaked in shame, fueled by feelings of inadequacy, and driven by external
validation rather than inner worth. It is a complex web of factors:
a search for identity,
the echoing pressures of society and the media,
the wounds of trauma,
the maddening obsession for control,
the whispers of biology and genetics,
the demands of sports that emphasize size and shape.
But this list is far from complete. For each individual a unique combination of factors
can trigger the descent into an eating disorder. Not everyone who shares these
struggles succumbs to the same fate, just as not everyone with a heartache ends up
broken. I’ve battled anorexia and bulimia for nearly half my life, reaching out to
countless resources in search of answers.
My path has been punctuated by the realization that the discussion and support most
often revolve around the female experience. Yet I know that as a man, I am not alone. I
am convinced that what I’ve witnessed is merely the tip of a well-concealed iceberg,
hiding a vast expanse of male voices stifled by secrecy.
Starving for Acceptance: One Man’s Journey with Anorexia and Bulimia is my
attempt to cast a brighter light on this shadowed corner of reality. My purpose is to
share my experiences and struggles with eating disorders and body image obsessions.
I hope other men will see themselves in my story. I urge anyone who suspects they have
an eating disorder to accept their infirmity and seek help.
Past Abuses and Struggles
A Mad Box of Rain shares your story of surviving and recovering from the sexual, physical, emotional, mental, institutional, and substance abuse you experienced in your childhood and teenage years. Why was this an important book for you to write?
I recently wrote this as a wedding gift for my second wife and her two teen children. I also have two teen sons. I found it difficult to verbally communicate with them about past abuses and struggles as a teen; and they had no real understanding of what growing up in Memphis in the 1980s meant, seeing that we live in Portland, Oregon. I wrote the book in six months, and I think it does a decent job explaining this to them. Mom and wife were the main editors.
How did you decide what to include and leave out in your memoir?
There were a lot of euphemisms that I took out based on the advice of a senior editor. I also had to change the names of a lot of the characters in order to protect their anonymity. I left out or changed a few details as well in order to continue the protection. It was very important to me not to break any innocent’s anonymity.
What was the most challenging part of writing your memoir, and what was the most rewarding?
The most challenging was opening myself up fully to the reader about my thoughts and feelings going through a lot of the abuse I endured. I had to be raw and honest with myself. Those feelings were not easy to feel. The most rewarding was the closeness I felt towards loved ones who supported me through this. I truly felt encouraged and loved. I was also very excited to be a finalist in this year’s Storytrade Book Awards.
What do you hope is one thing readers take away from your story?
That overcoming adversity makes you a stronger and better person. Don’t settle, be the good person you were meant to be. Don’t let anyone ever take that away from you.
Author Links: GoodReads | Website | Amazon
A fabulous and incredibly moving coming of age tale, Brian narrates his experiences growing up in a small southern town outside of Memphis, TN in the 1980’s, and how he survived and overcame personal tragedies dealing with abuse ranging from sexual to institutional. His emotional capacity to interweave the impact of childhood trauma with critiques on the overall mental health system serves as an honest and raw look at broader social issues. His introspective commentary and personal anecdotes help provide a deep connection to the reader with a conclusion that is extremely enlightening.
A Mad Box of Rain
A Mad Box of Rain by Brian J. Quattlebaum is a deeply moving and unflinchingly honest account of the author’s turbulent early years. Set against the backdrop of Memphis, Tennessee, Quattlebaum recounts a childhood shadowed by trauma yet marked by resilience. He narrates the lasting impact of the sexual abuse he suffered at the hands of a teenage family friend, a secret he carried into adulthood. Interwoven with this painful reality is the chaos of his family life, shaped by an older brother’s destructive spiral into alcohol and addiction before even reaching his teens. Their parents, well-meaning and devout Christians, fought to anchor their sons amidst this turmoil, balancing AA meetings with church in a desperate bid to keep their family afloat.
Quattlebaum’s story isn’t simply one of hardship. It’s about survival, strength, and the extraordinary will of a young boy who emerged from a brutal world determined to be something greater. It’s a testament to the human spirit’s capacity to heal, even when wounds run deep. Reading this memoir is not just witnessing a life but experiencing it: the humor, the heartbreak, and the unsettling truths that come with growing up in such circumstances. The book challenges the reader with its raw, unvarnished depiction of abuse. Quattlebaum doesn’t shy away from the discomfort or confusion that victims often feel, candidly sharing how he grappled with the complexity of his body’s reactions and the emotional weight of keeping such a dark secret. A particularly poignant moment describes his first attempt to run away at just nine years old, overwhelmed by his silence and guilt. His admission that his parents didn’t deserve the pain his escape caused is a line that strikes with full emotional force. Despite the darkness, Quattlebaum infuses his narrative with Southern humor and irony, making moments of levity shine through the grim reality. This juxtaposition brings a layered complexity to his writing, balancing the heaviness with a uniquely human touch. The author’s reflections reveal how he survived and has healed, speaking with bravery and self-awareness that inspires.
A Mad Box of Rain is both a challenging and rewarding read, punctuated by moments that will make you laugh unexpectedly and others that will leave you reflecting deeply. Brian J. Quattlebaum’s courage to share his story is commendable, and his hope of reaching those who might feel alone in their struggles is palpable. This book serves as a powerful reminder to remain vigilant and compassionate; after all, unseen battles often rage behind the faces we encounter every day. For that reason, I urge everyone to read this remarkable memoir; it leaves you with a greater sense of awareness and a renewed commitment to treating others with kindness.
Pages: 256 | ASIN : B0CZT4SN28
Return of the Sagan
![Return of the Sagan by [O'Donnell, Neil Patrick]](https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/51wQbY8q4nL.jpg)
Francis, a twenty-three year old man dealing with his own overwhelming fears brought on by Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, happens to be humanity’s next best chance at establishing life on Earth once more. Traveling aboard the Sagan, Francis faces all the struggles of a man coping with life in space and the anxiety of having one of his own forgetful moments bring about the destruction of the entire vessel and all who inhabit it. As a professor and trusted expert, it is Francis to whom the rest of the crew turn to as they make plans to return to Earth. Forced to break out of his comfort zone and abandon the safety of his classic literature, Francis obliges and proceeds to help save life as it was once known.
Professor Francis Burns, the main character in Neil O’Donnell’s Return of the Sagan, is one of the richest and most well-drawn characters I have encountered in a book in the science fiction genre. He is endearing from his first appearance and continues throughout the book to be relatable on a level most characters never reach. Francis’s battle with OCD is just one of the many aspects that keeps him down-to-earth. His constant references to Tolkien and the effortless way with which he quotes lines from Tolkien’s novels make him a less intimidating personality among the other characters.
O’Donnell’s desire to pepper his text with pop culture references adds to the book’s overall appeal. I am not a science fiction fan, but familiar names, books, movies, and song titles pull me in and give me more of a reason to continue reading when the more technical lingo tends to have the opposite effect. The author places these pop culture hooks in the perfect spots throughout the reading.
The unique blend of science fiction and fantasy emphasized by Francis’s extensive knowledge of literature and history is quite amazing to behold. The repopulation of some of the world’s most endangered animals was beautiful to visualize. However, the reappearance of extinct species–and aggressive predators, at that–was simply breathtaking. I hesitate to compare it in any way to Jurassic Park, but in some small ways, O’Donnell’s story bears a resemblance to the original movie’s plot.
I have to admit, I saw the plot going in a much different direction once the crew reached Earth. I won’t say I am disappointed, but I will say, without giving away the ending, that I looked for a resolution that never arrived. O’Donnell has left me to reach some of my own conclusions–and that, I appreciate. Whereas, some readers prefer to have the story wrapped up in a nice little package by the concluding lines, I prefer an author leave me with the desire to reread for clues and leave the book open for a sequel. O’Donnell definitely inspires as many questions about the fate of Earth’s human population as he does answers about the resurgence of plant and animal life.
I give Return of the Sagan 5 out of 5 stars. With a relatable main character and a plot filled with action from the opening chapter, O’Donnell has provided readers with a hit. Science fiction fans who seek memorable characters will not be disappointed with Professor Francis Burns, his extensive knowledge base, and his undying love for J.R.R. Tolkien.
Pages: 304 | ASIN: B00SP4BOZS
LITERARY TITAN 