Bent Pages shares personal stories from your life that changed and inspired you. Why was this an important book for you to write?

I originally wrote the book as a gift for my daughter. Most of the events in the book were events I had never been able to talk to her about. But I thought it was important for her to know these things. Our history involves our family history. Our present is so affected by our history and how we respond to events in our lives. It took getting some professional help for me to be able to face many of these issues. They seemed like such huge elephants in the room. Yet, I have discovered by sharing these “secrets” that many people have such elephants that have affected their lives. How we view these events makes such a difference in living our lives and our relationships with others. I wanted to give my daughter the gift of knowing me, all of me…especially since I never felt I really knew my own parents. My father left his family and children, never to return when I was only 18 months old. My mother tried to commit suicide more than once. Perhaps if I had known their experiences, I wouldn’t have judged them so harshly. Most of all, I wanted my daughter to know how much I deeply love her. She has been a most precious and wonderful gift to me!

I appreciated the candid nature with which you told your story. What was the hardest thing for you to write about?

Oh my, there were so many. Talking about the loneliness and isolation I felt as a child and how it affected me as an adult was very difficult to express. Reliving the sexual attack and the resulting chronic guilt that came with it was also difficult to relive. But perhaps the most difficult topic was learning to deal with rejection. They say time heals, but it merely masks emotional cuts. The least little action from someone can drudge up all that emotion when you least expect it. Healing comes from facing your fears, accepting the pain, and ultimately forgiving, while knowing my true worth is found in God rather than in other people or things. While writing, I had to once again learn to forgive. Sometimes that is the hardest thing to do, especially if the one you forgiving isn’t necessarily asking for forgiveness.

What were some ideas that were important for you to share in this book?

If there is one point I hope to make, it’s the importance of faith. Living life with God at the helm is an adventure. But it is an adventure we can trust in because of his great love for us. We don’t always understand why things happen in our lives. But we have a choice in how we view them. We can see ourselves as martyrs or victims. Or, we can see ourselves as victors, overcoming adversity with grace, resilience, and joy.

What do you hope is one thing readers take away from your book?

The critical life skills of trust, love, forgiveness, humility, mercy, unselfishness, and grace can still be learned as adults, even if they were not modeled well in our families. Don’t give up hope on that! No matter what age you are, hope can explode with possibilities, despite our circumstances, if we keep our focus on God. It is possible to let go and let God. As I watched my young daughter fall in love with God, the only father she had ever known, I inadvertently learned these critical life skills for myself through her innocent eyes and unconditional love.

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